the roil

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For the past several days I felt felt myself roiling.  I have always loved that word.  Joy, sorrow, wistfulness, pensiveness, anxiety, peace, fear, wanting, impatience, wondering, needing, frustration, serenity.  It troubles me when I feel as if I am being tossed “to and fro.”

It is during these days that I am very thankful that for all His dark strength and poetry and subtlety and mystery (even after all this time)…….Sir is solid.  Sure.  Clear.  While my emotions sway and betray me….He does not waver.  There is an incredibly underrated comfort in that I think.  We read novels about brooding, closed off men whom the heroine can never know……and we sigh and swoon.  But in the times when there are truly things to fear in life……a man who will write in the sand and hold my hand and look in my eyes and say…. “This. Clearly.  Now.  Depend on it.”  That is the kind of man to whom a woman can surrender things that the opaque man of the old school novel can never even dream to attain from her.

Thank You sir….for being a clear path to peace underneath the intrigue.

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