I love Sir. I love talking with Him, serving Him, being touched by Him, reading His messages, following His instructions, learning about myself with Him…….I am so very blessed that He is in my life.
That being said….distance sucks. A lot. Sometimes I miss Him so badly that it aches inside my chest. Yesterday was such a day. I knelt and pondered and wrote for Him. But the desire to reach out and touch Him was so intense. I am never exactly sure what to do on these days. I shared with Him that I missed Him. But every once in awhile, even though I have grown so much, those old fears and old patterns from a life I left behind make me tentative. I worry about being “too needy.” But the truth is….I DO need Sir. Not in a way that makes me less….but because….I love Him. I trust Him completely. I am His.
Days like yesterday stretch me though. I have to reach beyond those old worries about “being too much” and still be honest and vulnerable with Sir. There is nothing we can do at this point in our lives about the distance. But He shows over and over how much I can trust Him. How much He cares for me. How blessed I am, even when I cry for Him.
If you share a home or a town with your Sir……I confess to feeling a bit of envy at times.